BOSS RIIZE, Episode 3: The Riize of a Tyrant

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(Written September 17, 2024)

Welcome back!  When we left our RIIZE guys, So Hee had been overthrown in a successful coup by Won Bin, and voting was about to begin.  What was So Hee’s crime?  No idea.  But Eun Seok is being set up as our plotting villain, so let’s see if he turns out to be the next BOSS.

We open where we left off at the restaurant/someone’s house, and the voting booth has been moved right into the room with them.  Eun Seok tells So Hee that he could be re-elected as BOSS.  I sure hope so, because So Hee’s response is to look heavenward and say, “Being nice gets you nowhere.”  If he returns to the throne, he will be out for revenge, and I am 100% here for it.

Shotaro is already sucking up to Won Bin, saying, “Remember I wiped seaweed soup off your face earlier?”  He also tells Anton he loves him.  Meanwhile, Eun Seok simply leans over to So Hee and murmurs, “I will avenge you.”  NOW this show is getting good.

In the voting booth, Sung Chan vows revenge as he casts his vote.  “Won Bin and I endured so many requests and hardships,” he says.  Dude.  He had you put away the beach stuff.  It was a task that would have taken the two of you ten minutes if you weren’t so busy complaining and plotting a coup.  But he’s not done.  “Won Bin and I shall become the BOSS,” he declares to the camera in the voting booth. “We shall take revenge on them.”  Are we missing some footage where So Hee forces the workers to do his laundry and handle his fan calls?

Eun Seok is still scheming with Anton, saying, “Vote for me, and I’ll vote for you.”  Anton is smart.  “I don’t trust you,” he responds.

During the voting, everyone keeps mukbanging, and the food looks so good.  Anton is taking pictures of some of the foods he’s never had before, like crab shell fried rice.  I just want to crawl through the screen and taste it.

While the votes are being counted by the crew, the boys all agree it will be bad for everyone if Eun Seok wins.  They say this with Eun Seok right there at the table.  You’re not doing a good job as a villain if everyone is on to you and not afraid to say it to your face.  “I’m a peaceful person,” he insists, in between bouts of conspiratorial whispering.

The production crew finally announces there’s a glitch.  One of the boys only voted for one person instead of two.  It was one vote for Eun Seok.  So that ballot has been marked VOID.  Wait, what?  That ballot doesn’t count because it only had one vote on it?  I mean, we all know it was Eun Seok’s ballot, but still, this feels kind of disenfranchisey.  

Okay, we quickly learn two things.  One, the person with the voided ballot will get to vote again.  Two, the guilty party is not Eun Seok.  It’s Shotaro.  The oldest member and de facto Leader just gave himself away as a Eun Seok sympathizer.  The funniest part is that the rest of the group assumes that this part will get edited out, but nope.  They left it in.  The producers of this show are VICIOUS.

Shotaro casts a new ballot, and the winner is … Eun Seok.  A new day has dawned in K-pop Land, and it is a dark, cloudy day.

Anton is already regretting telling the new BOSS he didn’t trust him.  Everyone immediately starts sucking up to Eun Seok, and I know we’re about to see the new BOSS commit acts of cruelty that will make Game of Thrones look like Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood.

So Hee hands over the laurel, the seal, and what’s left of the money and his dignity.  The crew tells the group that each new BOSS gets 100,000 won ($75 USD) added to the budget.  But that’s only when the BOSS changes.  Which is incentive for the group not to vote for the same guy twice.  These showrunners are sneaky.

We’re off to a rough start when Eun Seok makes So Hee hold the appointment letter while he stamps it.  So Hee says the new BOSS is beaming a dark aura.  The graphics department decides to illustrate this by superimposing a black mist around Eun Seok, giving the unintended impression that he hasn’t showered in a week.

Anton, who really needs to keep his mouth shut, says the new workers need to be chosen.  Shotaro advises Eun Seok not to treat the workers poorly because he might regret it.  He’s not wrong, but being nice would make for a boring show.  Everyone knew what they were in for when they entered that voting booth.  As if to prove my point, Eun Seok suddenly says, “Water,” and everyone scrambles to get him water.  Oh, this is going to be FUN.

The new BOSS dictates that no more sodas can be ordered tonight, as that will take more money out of the budget.  Everyone must drink water for the rest of the meal, which I imagine is perfectly fine because they’ve been eating for almost an entire episode and must be on the verge of food comas by now.

On to choosing the workers.  Anton suggests that Eun Seok first find out who voted for him, like for example, himself.  Eun Seok simply says, “thank you,” and keeps eating.  I actually felt a shiver go through me.  Anton’s going to find himself cleaning the tour bus with his tongue if he doesn’t zip it.

The new BOSS issues a command:  “Make me laugh.  I’ll exempt the three people who make me laugh.”  When no one volunteers right away, he says quietly, “I’m ready to laugh.”  I’m pretty sure I hear the others whimpering.

Out of desperation, Sung Chan grabs a flower off the table and strikes a flirty pose.  This gets a laugh from Eun Seok.  Sung Chan is now safe.  Two more band members now have to play court jester.

Shotaro starts talking in a strange voice, and no one can figure out what he’s doing at first.  Then everyone realizes he’s imitating Eun Seok, and that earns a laugh from the BOSS.

There’s only one free pass left.  So Hee impulsively grabs a stone from the flower arrangement on the table and starts talking to it like it’s Eun Seok.  (“Seok” means “stone” in Korean.)  This gets the biggest laugh from the crew, but the new BOSS just gives him an icy stare.

I can’t believe that didn’t work.  I know one of the reasons Eun Seok won the vote was by vowing to avenge So Hee’s defeat.  And now he’s betraying that very bandmate, and you just know So Hee voted for him.  I might be genuinely afraid of Eun Seok right now.  He’s going to wind up overthrowing the entire management team at SM Entertainment by the end of this episode.

Anton makes a heart shape with his hands and starts doing aegyo.  He gets a colder reaction than So Hee did.  Oof.  This is PAINFUL.

Won Bin starts making some weird grunting noise and lunges at Eun Seok.  What looks like an assassination attempt is actually his impression of Eun Seok doing martial arts.  This performance gets the coldest stare yet.  Won Bin, I know you’re my bias, but you would have been better off just volunteering to be a worker.

 Eun Seok looks down at the table and says, “I’m getting bored.”  He finally tells the three losers to play Rock Paper Scissors for the exemption.  Won Bin wins.  Anton and our poor, sweet So Hee are the workers.  Anton looks anguished, and NOW Eun Seok laughs.  I’m starting to think he’s pure evil. 

The new BOSS demands that his workers stay seated until he is ready to stand up.  When he does stand, he says the table is a mess.  So Hee points out that they’re (allegedly) in a restaurant, so they shouldn’t have to clean up.  Eun Seok says the mess is still bothering him and orders the workers to stack the cups neatly.

We get confessionals from So Hee and Anton about how they’ve been betrayed.  I have a feeling the next coup will end with that laurel wrapped tightly around Eun Seok’s neck. 

We now cut to outside the restaurant to the huge, shiny RIIZE SUV.  We’re shown the perks inside waiting for the BOSS – a neck pillow, snacks, and a wrapped present in the seat.  Eun Seok makes his workers sit in the very back and then reclines his seat until he’s squashing them.  I have no words. 

The rest of the band is fascinated by the cameras set up in the SUV.  I’m so used to car cams on these shows, and this is the first time I’ve seen the idols actually reacting to them.  These guys are adorable.

The SUV drives on through some lovely coastal scenery.  Then they drive up into the mountains and arrive at Gangneung Solhyang Arboretum, the only pine-themed arboretum in South Korea.  It must smell like heaven.  I know I’m going to get some beautiful screenshots out of this.  Everyone hops out of the SUV to explore. 

The first stop is to a snack bar.  The guys beg the new BOSS to let them have coffee, and he tells them, “You had coffee earlier.”  I know caffeine addicts who would murder him right there in the parking lot.

Anton is eager to get on the trails.  He tells us when he lived in the States, he spent a lot of time in the woods.  I love this place and will let the screenshots speak for themselves.

But of course, we can’t enjoy the peace for too long.  Eun Seok gets tired and demands to be carried.  Anton struggles along the path with Eun Seok on his back.  My prediction of a sedan chair wasn’t too far off.

The boys finally arrive at a seat labeled “BOSS,” and Anton heaves the BOSS into it.  Now we see the first hopeful sign that Eun Seok’s cruel reign may be coming to an end.  The crew tells our band the arboretum hides a suitcase with twenty ballots in it.  The guys have thirty minutes to find the suitcase.  The first member to find it and bring it back to base camp will be the owner of all the ballots.  The BOSS gets the advantage of a 30-second head start, which I can’t imagine will be much help in this huge park.

The episode ends here.  I predict that Eun Seok will use his thirty seconds to form an army of woodland creatures to overthrow the entire band and begin a dark, authoritarian chapter in the history of RIIZE.  Gloom and despair will fall across the arboretum.  All hope will be lost.

Should be fun!  I can’t wait.  See you then.

Episode 4:  The Great Ballot War

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